oh so thankful

Sometimes I just need to listen to the most gangsta rap music I can find.... I don't know why, but it oddly makes me feel better when i turn it up really loud and dance. Then it gets really inappropriate [i've yet to figure out how to tell Pandora I don't like "dirty" lyrics] and I turn it off and go back to my actual real life. Haha, ya that happened tonight. Who writes nasty lyrics about things I can't even speak of? I am grossed out for life.

Now I'm sitting hear with a cup of medicinal tea to get rid of my cold while listening to my new obsession - Imagine Dragons [thanks brother for the recommendation] and it's starting to rain outside. I'm also amused by Amazon.com's recommendations for me.... they'd be a super bizarre mix to anyone from the outside looking in, but they are telling of my personality. Diverse and weird. Just like my music taste.

There's really no point to this post... just ramblings of a girl stuck at home tonight with a cold and no one to talk to. It's weird being alone. But that is all i'm going to say on the subject.

I would like to state that I'm just in a continual state of thankfulness lately and it's exhilarating... because that's the life we're supposed to be aiming for right? It's definitely not of my own doing... God's just blessing my heart a lot lately. Speaking to me through others words and actions - whether showing me parts of myself i need change in or encouraging the good that Jesus is in me.
It's a thrill every time I realize what's going on in this heart of mine. He's working on me extra these days and I'm so thankful. There's really no better way to pass these months of being on my own...

God continues to show me why I went through some of the stuff I thought wasn't fair or that scared the crap out of me or hurt my heart so deeply I thought I'd never heal.
It was all for a reason and for His glory.... it wasn't about me. It never is or should be.
I'm oddly and beyond all reason - thankful for all of it. 
For Jesus molding my heart into what it needs to be and continuing to shape me even now.

 ...Can't get enough of life lately...


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